I was at the public library today. You think you'd be safe at the library, right? Place to study, surrounded by books, only people there are people who are going to keep to themselves?
I take out the paper I'm supposed to read, then open my laptop (and proceed to get distracted by the lack of chat and write the previous post, in which there is a certain irony). I'm busily updating my blog when a guy walks up to my table. The conversation is as follows:
Guy: You look familiar. Is your name Heather?
Me: *thinking, "Did he really just use that on me?"* No...
Guy: *sits down without asking* Really? 'Cause you look just like a girl I know named Heather. Do I know you from somewhere?
Me: Did you go to Lassiter?
Guy: Long time ago.
Me: Go to Georgia Tech?
Guy: I actually go to Southern.
Me: Guess not then. *looks back at computer*
Guy: You really look like her though, except your eyes are more...shiny.
Me: *trying not to snicker* Oh, really?
Guy: Yeah, and when you smile, your cheeks get all pink. It's really cute.
Me: *laughing again* Um, thank you.
Guy: *says some other stuff I can't remember* And my friend and I, we're both actors...*other stuff I can't remember* And I'm in this band where I play <some instrument>. We're pretty good.
Me: Oh, really?
Guy: Yeah. *we say something about spirituality, i guess?* You might be interested in this book! *throws out a book on karma and the Dhali Llama*
Me: Oh, I don't believe in karma.
Guy: You don't believe in karma? You don't believe in anything.
Me: No, I'm Christian.
Guy: Oh, I see! Well, I'm not one to have a serious conversation with a total stranger...
Me: .....
Guy: But I've been a lot of places. I went to India, and this guy I was talking to there was remarking on how the Christian civilizations have the highest rates of suicide and alcoholism.
Me: Well, that's possibly because many people in our so-called Christian civilization don't really have any sort of spiritual connection to anything, and see no need to have any because they're nominally Christian. Thus, they drown their sorrows in alcohol and commit suicide.
Guy: ...I suppose that could be true.
Me: I'm sorry...what was your name?
Guy: You don't remember?
Me: No, you said it rather quietly.
Guy: Ryan.
Me: Well, it was nice to meet you, Ryan. *shakes his hand* I have dinner with a friend to go to, but perhaps I'll see you around. Good-bye!
This was heavily edited, due to time lapse and the fact that it was longer than I care to reproduce, but it is true to his character. He really said all that stuff about shiny eyes and a band and India. And I really was just sitting there, thinking, "Is this guy for real?"
This could easily turn into a lecture on the etiquette of wooing women, but we shall save that for another time. Suffice it to say that timing, observation, and subtlety are key.
Perhaps all that arrogance (and cheesy one-liners, I was half-expecting the library line) might have worked in a bar. But alas, I'm afraid it did not work on this girl in a library just trying to get her work done.
I take out the paper I'm supposed to read, then open my laptop (and proceed to get distracted by the lack of chat and write the previous post, in which there is a certain irony). I'm busily updating my blog when a guy walks up to my table. The conversation is as follows:
Guy: You look familiar. Is your name Heather?
Me: *thinking, "Did he really just use that on me?"* No...
Guy: *sits down without asking* Really? 'Cause you look just like a girl I know named Heather. Do I know you from somewhere?
Me: Did you go to Lassiter?
Guy: Long time ago.
Me: Go to Georgia Tech?
Guy: I actually go to Southern.
Me: Guess not then. *looks back at computer*
Guy: You really look like her though, except your eyes are more...shiny.
Me: *trying not to snicker* Oh, really?
Guy: Yeah, and when you smile, your cheeks get all pink. It's really cute.
Me: *laughing again* Um, thank you.
Guy: *says some other stuff I can't remember* And my friend and I, we're both actors...*other stuff I can't remember* And I'm in this band where I play <some instrument>. We're pretty good.
Me: Oh, really?
Guy: Yeah. *we say something about spirituality, i guess?* You might be interested in this book! *throws out a book on karma and the Dhali Llama*
Me: Oh, I don't believe in karma.
Guy: You don't believe in karma? You don't believe in anything.
Me: No, I'm Christian.
Guy: Oh, I see! Well, I'm not one to have a serious conversation with a total stranger...
Me: .....
Guy: But I've been a lot of places. I went to India, and this guy I was talking to there was remarking on how the Christian civilizations have the highest rates of suicide and alcoholism.
Me: Well, that's possibly because many people in our so-called Christian civilization don't really have any sort of spiritual connection to anything, and see no need to have any because they're nominally Christian. Thus, they drown their sorrows in alcohol and commit suicide.
Guy: ...I suppose that could be true.
Me: I'm sorry...what was your name?
Guy: You don't remember?
Me: No, you said it rather quietly.
Guy: Ryan.
Me: Well, it was nice to meet you, Ryan. *shakes his hand* I have dinner with a friend to go to, but perhaps I'll see you around. Good-bye!
This was heavily edited, due to time lapse and the fact that it was longer than I care to reproduce, but it is true to his character. He really said all that stuff about shiny eyes and a band and India. And I really was just sitting there, thinking, "Is this guy for real?"
This could easily turn into a lecture on the etiquette of wooing women, but we shall save that for another time. Suffice it to say that timing, observation, and subtlety are key.
Perhaps all that arrogance (and cheesy one-liners, I was half-expecting the library line) might have worked in a bar. But alas, I'm afraid it did not work on this girl in a library just trying to get her work done.
0 comments:
Post a Comment